[film reviews] 300 and TNMT

[argurotoxos]

One of the few nice features of the village we live in is a second-run cinema that only charges $4 per movie. As it happened, 300 was on the week I came home (namely, last week) and TMNT was on that weekend.

No report-style reviews this time. I read sage_3's reviews of both these movies before I saw them, so the review style is half-inspired from her and features a detailed list of what I did and didn't like in each movie with final comments and an overall rating at the end.

As usual, reviews contain spoilers.



--300--
((the good))

• the battle scenes. Lots of blood, spear wielding, and some decapitation. I normally don't like slow motion/speeding up effects during battles as they try too hard to be dramatic and often come off feeling very artificial, but they worked here. The music during the battle scenes was also good; at one point, it had a metal theme which emphasized (at least to me) the ahistoricality of the film. Finally, there were certain moments where I really liked the colour scheme, sepias and dark blood against bright Spartan red.
  
  
• the end credits. Visuals that move dramatically along with the credits instead of simple scrolling text aren't common and I like credits that do unique things and actually make you feel like watching them.
  
  
• there were a few good lines, particularly the ones that referenced history (e.g., the comment about fighting in the shade when confronted with the Persian archers).

((the bad))

• the Persians. What happened to them?! Xerxes is a System Lord! The Immortals are orcs disguised as ninjas and wear masks that make them sound like Darth Vader! They have a battle rhinoceros, and apparently also have connections to Saruman as I swear I've seen some of these creatures in the Lord of the Rings films! Their women are whores who have sexual orgies!
  
  . . . to see the Persians debased into such a one-dimensional Army Of Evil is appalling.
  
  
• on a similar note, the Greeks! They certainly faired much better than the Persians did, but there were still drastic changes. Apparently, the Spartan ephors are recruited from the same place the Persians get their Immortals. The religious festival Sparta is supposed observing is mentioned a few times in the beginning, but never seen nor heard of again, even in scenes that take place in Sparta. It also appears that the Spartans are suffering from amnesia; they all forgot that they have two kings and that 'boy-loving' (i.e. pederasty) was part of their culture, too [although the Spartans were known for their chastity in such relations, yet another reason why Plato admired them].
  
  
• the horribly rendered CGI wolf that young Leonidas fights in the beginning.
  
  
• the overuse of off-screen narration. Alexander had the same flaw.
  
  
• the music with a wordless female vocal soaring in the background. It's been used in every single film I've seen that's supposed to be set in Ancient Greece and gets old very quickly.
  
  
• the surprisingly undramatic final confrontation between Xerxes and Leonidas.

If you'd like to learn about the Battle of Thermopylae, but in a historical fiction context, I'd highly recommend Mary Renault's Lion in the Gateway. It's usually listed as a young adult or children's book, but the writing style Renault uses, though perhaps not as complex as in her novels, is still relatively advanced. The book covers the entire Persian War, but features a chapter dedicated to (and derives its title from) the Battle of Thermopylae.


Overall: 2/5



--TMNT--
((the good))

• the Turtles are still their awesome selves. Even though Leonardo and Raphael got more screen time than Michelangelo and Donatello, all four had their share of good moments.
  
  
• Donatello as a tech support guy was hilarious.
  
  
• Raphael. For the first time, I actually liked him more than Leonardo.
  
  
• all of the Turtles' fight scenes.
  
  
• the Raph/Leo fights were particularly awesome and deserving of a separate comment. I loved the way the conflict played out and how it was eventually resolved.
  
  
• Mikey's sewer skateboarding scene.
  
  
• Casey Jones.
  
  
• Karai, the leader of the Foot Clan.
  
  
• so many short, amusing moments. Nothing was wasted and even the ones that seemed trivial (like Casey accidently knocking over the vase) weren't forgotten and became important later.
  
  
• the reference to the other Turtle films near the end in Splinter's room.
  
  
• some of the scene transitions were quite clever, but I can't remember which ones it was now that made me think that.

((the mixed))

• the main plot. At first, it seemed rather cliché, but I enjoyed the way it played out and how the 'bad guy' wasn't really a bad guy at all. Very nice. I also liked how the brotherhood of the 'antagonists' mirrored that of the Turtles, but with different outcomes. The commentary on immortality (and the Alexander reference!) was also good and reminded me of Vampire: the Masquerade.
  
  
• the animation. I really liked the landscapes and I got used to the Turtles, but I disliked the way the humans looked.

((the bad))

• the flashback battle in Latin America near the beginning looked too artificial.
  
  
• it was never clear what exactly Leo was learning down in Latin America. I know he was supposed to be training to be a better leader, but is it really best to do that in a situation where there's no one to lead?
  
  
• April.
  
  
• Splinter.

Best superhero movie since Batman Begins. I'm planning on buying the DVD when it comes out.


Overall: 4/5


I still have a lot of catch-up to do; since getting home, I've begun a campaign to clean my entire room for the first time in years.